"I WISH SOMEONE TOLD ME..."

Hello, lovelies!

Have you ever thought about things you know now but wish someone told you earlier? Or at least you came to the realization earlier? Here’s a list of things I’ve personally learned on life’s journey and I frankly wish I knew them earlier.

It’s okay to cry

2018 really had me holding in a lot of emotions. There were times I was close to crying and I would just wave it off with a smile, put on a facade and tell myself "I'm strong, I won't cry". I likened tears and show of emotions to being weak. I never wanted to be seen crying and as crazy as it might sound I didn't want to be labeled a "crybaby".  I remember once, I spent the night crying and I woke up with a tear-smeared face. My friends saw through me. I wasn't okay but when they asked, of course, "strong Nazam" forced a smile and pushed it away. I really wish on one of those days, someone looked at me and told me it was very okay to cry. I wish someone told me I didn't have to hide my emotions to come off as strong. It's all good now, though. I learned myself and I know now it’s very okay to cry when there's a need to.

 No one owes you anything

Quite unfortunate I had to learn this the hard way. I won’t say I’m the nicest person but I do try. Now when I do things for people I naturally expect that when I need something it shouldn’t be a problem for those people to help out. I’ve come to realize that this life is a hot pot of beans. It doesn’t always work that way and not everyone thinks the way I do. I really wish at some point someone somewhere let me on on this. It would have saved me from a whole lot of disappointments I experienced from putting my expectations high.        

The way you treat yourself is the way others will treat you

This is facts, to be honest. While I was reflecting on my past year, it just came flying in. There were times I was feeling like nothing inside but I tried to lift up my spirit outwardly and I noticed that was the way the people around me saw and treated me. In reverse cases, if I decide to let the feeling of nothingness overtake me outwardly, the people around me – sometimes unconsciously – would treat me in the same manner. If I criticize myself at everything I do, then people will pick up that same attitude and channel it to me. This is something I wish someone told me or at least I realized earlier; it would have been of great help.

People are not mindreaders – tell them what you’re thinking

I used to be one to bottle up things when someone offends me or I don’t feel right about something and then somehow expect the person involved to figure it out. I would keep it in and deceive myself that I’ve let it slide when in reality I’m just a time bomb waiting to go off. Why exactly would I do that? To be honest, most times it’s the fear of a negative reaction to my expression. Truth is I would never actually know what the reaction would be so it is much better to express myself. I have learned now that I’m not going to make things better by keeping it to myself; chances are I might make things worse.

 It’s okay to let go

Letting go of things has to be the hardest task for me ever. I hold on to little unimportant things that turn into a large mass of junk. I tell myself that I’d be in need of them someday and I just keep holding on even when there’s clearly nowhere to fit them in and they’ve become toxic. Same goes to people. I never really want to let go of people no matter the situation. Truth is certain people are actually not meant to stay in my life forever. They are not necessarily bad people but they just cannot be there. I keep holding on even when it is glaring how weary it is making me. It is one of the things I wish someone did tell me. It is totally okay to let go.

That’s it, guys. Are there things like that you wouldn’t mind sharing? The comment section is open.

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Nazam💜